CrazyinTX

In Laws

When we went on vacation, I stopped and put flowers on my grandparent's graves.  I really had some awesome grandparents.  My grandpa died when I was 14, it broke my heart.  He was like a father to me b/c my own parents divorced when I was 4 and I had a stepdad til I was 15 and another stepdad  til he passed away when I was in my 20's.  But Grandpa was always a permanent thing in my life.  I remember how my grandparents didn't have a lot of money, but they would always come get us kids (4 of us) and spend time with us and take us to the store to get whatever goodies our hearts desired!  They were 2 special people.

It kind of makes me sad that my Mom lives 4+ hours away and doesn't get to spend the time with my kids that she would like.  My Mom is an awesome grandma!  She is fun and she has 11 grandkids total and I know if she lived nearby, we would not even have to ASK her to babysit!

  And my mother in law, well...that's a whole 'nother story!  She has 2 grandkids, my two kids.  She sees my kids maybe 3 or 4 times a year, she lives around 10 minutes from us.  It is a very, very sad thing for me and it has even made me very angry.  She and I  don't get along.  I guess because there is a lot of hurt there.  Not too long ago, she came over after my daughter got off the bus, and she went thru my daughter's closet to "see"  if she had any jeans, since she wore capris to school.  (This is a woman who goes months without seeing her grandkids, and atleast 4 to 5 weeks before calling.) She then decided to fold my laundry. I was LIVID.  I mean, she folded my underwear, for goodness sakes!! WRONG!!  Hubby doesn't even have a good relationship with her....but she blames me for this. He says he is tired of being the only one maintaining the relationship, so he has stopped trying.  Well, we got back from vacation, and hubby is like "Momma would love to see the caverns, we all ought to go together next time."  HUH??  Is he nuts???  

 She had hubby at 14 years of age, and another child when she was 25 so I totally get that she is young(48), doesn't want to deal with grandkids 24/7 but for her to not even see her grandbabies for 3 to 4 months at a time, COME ON!! That just ain't right.  I have prayed about this situation, but I am still unhappy with her and the comments she has made about how she "has a life" and she will see the kids when she wants to see them, which is apparently NEVER!!  We borrowed her spare car one time while ours was in the shop and she made us pay for the tags...$40 to use this car for 2 days.  She is really something else.  Anybody else have in law problems?? Oh, let me mention that my father in law is great, hubby's dad died before we married but mother in law remarried and I love him to pieces. But she RULES this man, he runs behind her like a puppy. 

Families ...

1:35 PM, Mar. 20, 2007 .. Posted by davey327

... can be difficult, even impossible. I have no relationship with my father, my mother is dead, and we had mended our relationship yrs. before she died, which I'm happy for. I came from an abusive family. My mom didn't talk to either of her parents, so their was no relationship to speak of there, although I did get together with them before they passed. My dad's parents were like your grandparents, great. I have nothing but wonderful memories of them. As for your situation with your mom in law, it's too bad that she has to be that way. She's missing out on her grandchildren's lives and someday she will probably regret that. But don't let it eat away at you. It's her loss.

Untitled Comment

5:01 PM, Mar. 20, 2007 .. Posted by redsmom94

My ex-mother in law was like that. She retired in her early 50's, had 6 weeks of paid vacation a year, and made a salary in the upper 5-figures when she retired. When my daughter was little, she was taking a trip from MI to TX. We lived in northeast NE/northwest IA. I asked if she would schedule a layover in Omaha and we would drive the 90 minutes and meet her there with the baby. NOPE!!! "I only fly non-stop." was the reply - never mind that this was her only granddaughter, and one of only two grandchildren the woman has. She did finally come see her a few days when she was 5 yrs old before she started kindergarten. My daughter is almost 13, and she hasn't seen grandma-dearest yet. We are much better off without her and her son.