Boo's Place

I'm reading this book its Aprils Book for October 2006 Mommy Board on Babyfit.com

My Birthday is...TODAY

Today is my BIrthday. I'm 28 years old. Its down right depressing. I feel like I've not accompished a thing in my life. I've been so depressed lately. I think I have post partum depression although my OB doesn't believe in it. I really don't know what to do.

Leah Turns 6 months Next Friday. I'm wanting to get more pictures of her done. I want to wait though until she is completely sitting up on her own. I got her an Easter Dress and it has butterflies all over it. Its so adorable. I'm hoping to get mine sometime this weekend. I hope Marty will go to church with me Sunday. No matter what he does I will go to church this Sunday. I may not go like I need to but,I will go this weekend because its Resurrection Sunday and I always go then no matter if I want to or not. Its been so hard to find a dress this year none of the stores really have any easter dresses out. I need to find something teething biscuits or something. Leah is cutting teeth so maybe this will help her out. She has already cut her 2 bottom teeth almost 2 months ago.

At My Whits End

Miracles on Grey's

I don't know if any of you caught Grey's this week but,it was very jaw dropping. I just can't believe the fate of Meredeth would be death. I mean would the writers of the show be that stupid. The show would be over as we know it. I think I'd probably stop watching. I know other's would too. I'm saving up for an ipod video and I can't wait till I can afford to get it. I plan to put Grey's Anatomy music on it. and the shows.

Bad Mother

I Love little Josey more than anything but,lately I just don't feel like a good mother. Seems like I can't do anything to satisfy her. Ever since I got this new 'puter I have spent time on her for alone time because I need time away for myself then,I feel quillty. I really do love my daughter but,when I've only had 4 hrs of sleep I ask myself "Why"? Lately it seems my hubby and I are both on the edge and we snap at each other. I feel like our marriage is suffering we rarely spend time alone anymore. We spent a few hours alone Saturday after we got off work and that's not happened in over a month. I love him but,sometimes he never helps out. The house is a total wreck. I don't get much done anymore because she's been very demanding lately.

I found out today that My hubby's cousin has been holding her alot and walking her around alot. His mother babysits for us. It highly ticked me off. Because she wants that from us and I can't do it I try to spend time with her and bond with her but,in reality I have to get things done around the house and I can't sit around and do that. I wished we could afford for me to stay at home.

What a Child needs most

Leah has been sick these past few days. She's done nothing but,cry and sleep. She's not taken her bottle much today according to the baby sitter. If she gets any sicker I want to take her to the doc. She has had RSV once this winter. I've been sick all day too not sure if its sickness or just tired. I am having to go back and forth to the Doctor alot lately. I've been hurting in my hip area since I had Leah. I don't go back till March 9th.

Last nite leah Kept crying on our way back from taking her big sissy to her moms house(My Step-daughter's) well she was really cranky. I'm not sure what it is. She could be cutting teeth. I rubbed her gums and she quit crying. But,she started again. We didn't get in bed till almost 11pm. I hope she sleeps better tonite. She would sleep awhile and wake up. Once I got her up and started walking around with her and she feel asleep on my chest. It was so precious. I couldn't ask for nothing else at this point in my life. She makes life worth it. I always wondered what was my purpose in life. I've been feeling bad lately. Seems like the baby has gotten attached to her father. I guess I've been jealous. I want her all to myself. I had her all on my own for 9 months. The she was highly dependent on me once she was in the world. I've just felt like she doesn't want me around. She's only 4 months old but,I still felt that way. Last nite made me feel like she still needs me more than I realize. What A child needs Most is both of their parents giving them all the love that's humanly possible.

I realized as a christian what Giving up a child would be like like God and Mary too gave up. I couldn't do it. She's so precious. Children is one of God's Greatest Gifts he can give us...and he gave up that gift that we would have life.

House work

I hate cleaning house but,I need to start on it before hubby gets home. I've been spending way too much time online lately. I got a bin to put some of Leah's Old Clothes in. I am going to put in Marty's Aunts Attic until I could use later? Or maybe even Leah would have a child of her own one day that she could use some of it. Who Knows I may sell some of it on ebay? That's if I ever find out I can't have more children.

I still need to clean my bedroom,tidy the kitchen and clean the bathroom up...ugh I hate house work lately. Seems like I'm always too tired to do anything with the hours I work lately. I usually take a nap on Saturday evenings and don't even wake up till Sunday Morning I've been so tired.

An electrican had to come Out today to check out OUr stove. It must had a surge problem the other nite. The lights blinks and the eye burst into flames all of a sudden. Then my dvr went out and had to reboot up. Well,I guess I better get off here as much as I'd like to stay here all day.

I got The Lake House last nite. Hoping to get Hubby to sit and watch with me tonite. Have a good weekend everyone

work work work

After Tomorrow I will have worked 56 hours this week. I am so tired of working all the time I wished I could have a Saturday off work. I am so stressed out. I went back to work about 8 weeks after I had "Josey" . I miss being with her so much. I wished we could afford me to stay home. I'd love to find some sort of side business so I could. Work is really stressing me lately. They put me to doing the finishing work to the molding for the boat parts we do at work. I'm "suppose to be making more money but,I really don't think thats happening in the same Dept this lady makes more than me and she doesn't do the same thing...she rounds the parts before I get them. My boss told me that I would be making more money but,I feel like I'm getting hoodooed...

This lady,Holly works across from me at work. She said she was a christian but,all she does is grip and complain about everything that exsists. I'm so tired of it. When My I-Pod arrives I'm going to start taking it to work so I don't have to listen to her gossip and complaints. When I first started to work by her she seemed like someone whom I could become good friends with but,I believe she's talked about me behind my back. She talks about everyone. I can't stand that!! Her and the girl that works behind her talks all the time I'm getting tired of it and I know alot of other ppl are too. Who knows maybe she's the reason why I've not gotten a raise yet. I know I could do better at my job. I am trying hard. But,I don't think I will ever master it. I hate it to be honest. My heart wants to open a business but,I don't have the money and I don't know what I really want to get into. Would Love to work at home and be able to stay at home with "Josey"

Just in case you missed Last Nites Grey's Anatomy

New Computer..and Grey's Anatomy

I got me a new Laptop last but, much to my knowledge it didn't have enough memory so by Friday I took it back and got me a desktop computer. I like it much better. It took me almost all weekend to figure out how to hook my DSL up..I finally just gave up and called my sister she came over Sunday around 1pm. She finally gave up too and I got her to call the Tech Support Guy from my Service Provider. Come to find out it was the wrong ISP and DNS #'s I should come to Expect that from my telephone Company.

But,everything is up and running now. I'm trying to figure out how to play movies on here. I want to get Grey's Anatomy on here. I haven't watch the first 2 seasons and I would love to see them. I know reruns are on Lifetime now I record them onto my DVR but,with my hubby I can't watch anything I like.

Thinking about talking my Hubby into letting me buy a IPod Video PLayer so I can keep all my Grey's Anatomy on there. I just love that show. I am such a fanatic now. I haven't watch the first 2 seasons I just became a lover of the show midway through season 2. Is there anyone a Lover of this show. If you want to start some discussions about the show let me know. I wished I could find a screensaver of them

Books I've read

Started on Thanksgiving Nite but,I didn't get to finish around the new year. 3 novellas.

JENNIFER CRUSIE
Mayhem ensues under the mistletoe as a determined shopper grabs the very last hot toy action figure off the shelf, only to find herself plunged into the middle of a real-life spy game—in the arms of a sexy secret agent. . .

LORI FOSTER
Two dedicated coworkers with a lot of secrets (and fantasies!) between them must plan a Christmas party side by side—and discover a love worth celebrating—in this steamy office romance.

CARLY PHILLIPS
A “mistletoe moment” begins when a no-nonsense lawyer intent on seducing her boss meets his twin instead—after giving him a scintillating kiss that leaves him begging for more. . .

Book Description
The Womens Murder Club returns in a shockingly suspenseful thriller. Plunging into a burning

townhouse, Detective Lindsay Boxer discovers three dead bodies..and a mysterious message

at the scene. When more corpses turn up, Lindsay asks her friends Claire Washburn of the medical

examiners office, Assistant D.A. Jill Bernhardt, and San Francisco Chronicle reporter Cindy Thomas

to help her find a murderer who vows to kill every three days. Even more terrifying, he has targeted

one of the four friends. Which one will it be?

Just started I love reading books on Alaska.

From Publishers Weekly
Roberts shines again with a nuanced tale of the Alaskan wilderness and the appealing eccentrics who cluster there. Former Baltimore cop Nate Burke accepts the unlikely post of police chief of Lunacy, Alaska (pop. 506), to stave off the depression caused by divorce and the traumatic death of his partner, for which he holds himself partly responsible. His early days in the close-knit town are quiet except for minor disturbances and a dalliance with a feisty bush pilot, Meg Galloway. Then Meg's father, who disappeared 16 years before, is found frozen in a remote mountain cave, an ice ax in his chest. The discovery that Pat Galloway was murdered—most likely by a local—shakes up the town and drives his murderer to commit a second, cover-up killing. Though state authorities dismiss that death as suicide, Nate pursues it as a crime—a decision that puts him at odds with many outspoken Lunatics, as the townspeople call themselves. With quiet inexorability he fields the flak, uncovers long-forgotten events and finds a tough but loving balance with the fiercely independent Meg. Though billed as romantic suspense, the novel forsakes artificial genre conventions in favor of a wry, affectionate look at community bonds, generational wounds and soul-testing landscapes. The result is a richly textured novel that captures the intimacy of smalltown police work, the prickliness of the pioneer spirit and the paradox of a setting at once intimate and expansive, welcoming and hostile, indisputably American and yet profoundly exotic to those in the Lower 48.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Books Online

I found a really great program Online that you can post books and swap for something you like.

All you do is pay postage to send the books you don't want anymore. I've now gotten 4 books

since joining the website about 3 months ago. I think its awesome. No hurries about reading the book

before its due at the library any more. I have a baby and sometimes I don't get to read like I would like to.

Welcome to Our Family

Well,Life has been so hectic since Leah Josephine was born. I try to find clarity throughout the day to keep me sane. I try to read or take a walk or something. I will be posting some of my journal I kept while I was pregnant with Josey. I miss being pregnant with her. I miss having her all to myself.

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